One thing about people having leverage over me makes me do is realize when I have done it to others. It also makes me so aware that I keep myself in check in order to not do this in the future. So, that's a good thing.
However, it is quite frustrating when people, especially people close to you, use it as power over you. Let's say, hypothetically, that you depend on someone for transportation and, all is well. You enjoy carpooling together and the time spent with each other can be a great bonding opportunity. Or they let you have full use of the car which is also nice so that you can get to work or run errands or whatever. A car is nice. It provides a certain amount of freedom.
One day, for whatever reason, you discover that you should not express your feelings about living situations, for example, without that person using the transportation situation as leverage against you.
You end up with a relationship in which you had better not utter a complaint or suggestion or wish unless you want the other person to hold something against you. Leverage.
I won't help you if you do/don't__________ do....
I won't take you anywhere or let you use my car if you do/don't do...
If you don't _________, I will remind you that it is MY car you are using.
I won't continue helping with bills if you don't do things my way.
I won't do anything if you do/don't...
And just like that, someone has power over you.
How nice it would be if everyone just helped out others because it's a nice thing to do. Not because we might get miffed and hold it over their heads.
What motivates us to get and hold leverage over others? Fear of not being in control, perhaps. I almost hope it's more fear related than just being mean or manipulative.
Do others use leverage against you? Do you use it against others?
This is Day 12 of the A-Z Challenge!
I can't imagine that there is anyone who hasn't had someone use leverage against them at one time or another...or have used leverage against someone they know. It's sad, but most likely true. Power is a strong drug.
ReplyDeleteTrue, sadly. It is a strong drug. I think it changes people all the time. And not for the good.
DeleteI am human and as such I am pretty sure I have done so, I would like to say I haven't but somehow I don't think that would be right, that said I do try not to do that
ReplyDeleteSadly, I know I've done it. I do appreciate being more aware, however, from having it done to me. And this keeps me from doing it or at least gives me the opportunity to stop. Ha!
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