Monday, November 17, 2014

You're Not THAT Fat

Reddit. Have y'all been over there? I've recently started reading/watching a few posts. Most of them are stupid. Some are interesting. Others are so ridiculous that the people writing/videoing should be put away. Then there are the posts that are truly hilarious and even some that are thought provoking. In other words, it's pretty much like any other place on the internet.

I read one entitled: I really don't need to hear your opinion on my body weight. Or anyone else's body weight. 

The writer gives us several scenarios in which she (he?) is exposed to comments regarding their weight/body image such as: "Yeah, but your weight looks really good on you." "You must eat a lot of sweets." and "Yeah, but you're not fat like her."

Ok. So, this person seems to have friends and come into contact with others who are of the opinion that he/she is carrying more weight than is socially acceptable. And they feel the need to comment. I believe that a couple of those are what we commonly refer to as, back-handed compliments. Or a CYA statement (CYA = cover your ass after you've said something really stupid and insensitive).

The whole post, short though it was, was simply pointing out that insensitivity is rampant and stupid. That it can hurt the feelings of our fellow human beings and that our opinions about such things as body image can be damaging. Which was totally wasted on a few of the commentators who responded with statements such as: "Get used to it. If being fat bothers you, eat less and move more." and "Are you happy being fat?"

Way to miss the point entirely, idiots. Thaaaat's right. I just made a comment in regards to your (referring to those making the negative comments) lacking intellectual capacity. How does it feel?

Frankly, it doesn't really matter why the comments of personal opinion about the appearance of others flies, it simply is not nice. Maybe those people we laugh at in the 'Seen at Wal-Mart' pictures just lost everything in a fire and this was all they were given to wear. Maybe the people who are overweight have deep emotional scars or medical issues that have resulted in an unhealthy relationship with food which is made worse by nasty comments. Maybe it's something as simple as a difference of taste in clothing or make up or whatever.

I love to 'people watch.' It's fun. I will watch and make up stories about their lives but I always try to make it nice and my stories are never uttered within hearing range of anyone. It's an 'inside-my-head' game. I realize that there are people who will don totally inappropriate clothing before heading out the door. I mean, if they're wearing something that should be worn while dancing around a pole in a dark, smokey establishment but are on their way to the opera...well...I don't think that the attitude 'they're asking for comments' is the way to go here.

We've all got our problems. There's no need to add to them with negative comments. What purpose do these negative word serve? None. And, in my opinion, their utterances is a form of bullying. AND, I don't like it.

Maybe some folks are looking for attention. Any attention. But mostly, we simply are who we are and make the choices we make because that's what we know or have...And we should be able to be without ridicule.

Ok, y'all- time to grind YOUR grits.


  1. You just ground my grits for me! Ha! Your opinions are always pretty much right on target with my own. As a person who needs to shed a few pounds, but takes at least three medications that contribute to weight gain, I don't need to hear from others that I should just eat less. That would help, but it is not the entire answer. We really need to love people for who they are inside!! Grind away, my friend!

    1. Amen to loving who people are on the inside. Thanks! I'm in good company. :)

  2. WELLLLLLLLLLLL......I had suffered from most of my childhood, teens and then adult life with anorexia/bullima. Most of the negative comments came from (and still come from) family, I am noW pleasantly plumped...and like I tell ppl, shut your traps because you have no idea on what I have been through...and the shoes I have walked in. TMI.

    1. Amen, Sista! :) People are so willing to give that unsolicited advice but never want to know what the situation is or was or who the person truly is. Sad, but true. And they miss out on knowing some amazing people too. :)


Welcome, friends! Please spew forth some wisdom for me. I'm quite certain I need it!